When OCD keeps you from Happiness in Love


People with OCD sometimes learn to contain it themselves through neutralization and rationalization. Still, even if one has other aspects under control, OCD can keep you from happiness in love. Those with OCD are wracked with indecision about whether or not to say get married, stay in a relationship or even date someone. Yet, the sufferer may not even be aware that it is OCD that’s blocking their ability to advance to the next level. If you think you or someone you know might be suffering from OCD or if certain OCD like tendencies are torpedoing their love life, check out these warning signs and see if they are familiar. People with OCD can’t tolerate even the slightest doubt. So if this person is wracked with doubt that might be an indicator. Then the fear of making a wrong decision plagues them. They slowly become convinced that the relationship won’t ever work out. Now they go over and over again in their mind whether or not they are truly in love with this person. They become obsessed with the issue. They go through the other’s list of qualities to see if they measure up to what they are looking for. But the victim of OCD will never get to the bottom of this. Soon they seek out the assistance of others and more often than not start to feel better about the relationship.

Soon however the questions begin again. Will this person love me? Will they cheat on me? Soon the OCD sufferer may start acting strange, making their significant other annoyed or worried. This reaction from their lover may make the OCD sufferer feel as though the relationship is in fact doomed, and decide to break it off. Soon however the one who has OCD may come to understand that these troubling thoughts are their own doing. They are going to try then and control them. These impulses however keep coming. Their partner may notice little signs of their self-control and worry about them, which again may backfire as the OCD person thinking that there is trouble in the relationship. Next, the OCD sufferer may try to avoid the triggers that start this line of thinking from occurring. But this avoidance, say of staying in all the time versus going out where the triggers may be could start static in the relationship, causing the doubts to rise up again. Lastly, the OCD sufferer may feel tremendous guilt but not know what to do. OCD has certain genetic links and is triggered by stress. Look and see if others in your family have had an anxiety disorder. Furthermore, seek out therapy. Make sure you find a qualified therapist who you connect with and has dealt with this issue in the past. Open up to your partner and let them know what’s going on. Ask them to come to therapy with you. For more advice on this topic, read Loving Someone with OCD: Help for You and Your Family by Karen J. Landsman, Kathleen M. Rupertus, and Cherry Pedrick.

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