Lots of guys are dense when it comes to women. Some get it, but it takes time. There are things guys learn eventually about women through trial and error. If you are a guy trying to get a head start or reflect on what you learned, or a woman who wants to recognize these and give a guy in her life a heads up, read on. First, realize that a girl doesn’t want to be called up last minute and asked out. If you are nearby and want to check and see if she is free, feel free to call or text. But if you are drunk at the bar and calling late, don’t bother. And if you keep calling spontaneously out of the blue instead of making dates with her, you are sending her the wrong message. You are saying her schedule doesn’t matter, and that she should drop everything to come meet you. Instead, schedule dates with her. Keep the spontaneous stuff few and far between. If you two are physical, after being intimate with a woman take the time out to cuddle her, talk to her, and show her you care. Don’t start checking your phone messages, roll over and go to sleep, or take off. It’s not only rude, it sends the message that you are done with her and it’s time to move on, that she isn’t important outside of the physical realm.
Don’t think automatically you are the only one. After women are out of their teens and twenties, they’ve had their hearts broken a few times. They also know what they want. So they date furiously trying to find the one they want. If you think she’s been after you to commit this whole time, you may be surprised to find that she dumps you for someone else she’s been seeing. Guys, if you were supposed to call or text and didn’t, you need to give her an explanation, and it better be good. Another thing to consider is when a woman is talking to you about a problem she has, she doesn’t always need your opinion or advice. Sometimes she just needs her concerns validated and to know that someone cares. So take care to validate her emotions first. Then ask if she needs any advice. If you can master this, you will make her feel magnificent. Most guys just offer advice and flub it. If you know the lady is PMSing, don’t make jokes. Ask her if there is any way you can make her feel better. Lastly, if you want to send a text about how much you miss her or appreciate her, send it. Even if you think it comes off as needy or too sappy, chances are she’ll love it. If you would like to learn more about women and how they think, read the advice of Shaunti and Jeff Feldahn in their book, For Men Only: A Straightforward Guide to the Inner Lives of Women.