Science Says What Kind of Men Women are Most Attracted to

attraction

Science Says What Kind of Men Women are Most Attracted to

Guys are traditionally the pursuers, and even though we live in an enlightened society most women still prefer it that way. But lots of guys wonder what kind of man women are attracted to, and how to bring the best qualities out in themselves. Women tend to vary greatly in tastes. Lucky for most poor dolts who have hardly a clue, science has stepped in to try and answer the dizzying, age-old question of what kind of guy women want. Here are some of the things science has uncovered. If you’re flying without your wingman, you may find yourself cruising over lonesomeville for quite some time. For one thing, women rate men more attractive in group photos rather than when by themselves, at least according to a study out of the University of San Diego. Therefore, it stands to reason you look better when someone’s there with you. Researchers say this is due to something called the “cheerleader effect.” People look more attractive with their faces together, since incongruities in any one person are sort of evened out by the whole group. Another thing, women like men who know how to work a room. If you are always with an entourage and you’re the life of the party, or at least she thinks you are, you look high status and someone fun to be around.

Are you a single dad? Be sure to take your baby out cruising. Just keep it during daytime hours. Not only will you get father of the year, you might score a few phone numbers. A study in France found that men who cooed, smiled at and talked to infants were 40% more likely to score a woman’s phone number than those who ignored a baby. Researchers say it shows a greater propensity for being a good dad, should the couple have offspring. Some guys shave every day. Others sport a righteous beard. But why not shave every ten days? According to Australian researchers, men who did so were seen as the most attractive. This layer of stubble is thought to project just the right level of masculinity. Here’s some simple advice. Get some nice wheels and you’ll turn heads. If you can’t afford it, borrow some. A British study found that the same dude in a Bentley Continental was found way more attractive than one in a Ford Fiesta, even with the same clothes and facial expressions. Status is the reason, and the projection of resources which he may be willing to share with a certain, special lady.

If you’re an animal lover, taking your dog for a walk may not just be a necessity, but a way to meet someone. A French study found that women were three times more likely to give up their digits to a man walking his dog versus one who approached alone. Dogs break the ice. They also project kindness, sensitivity and thoughtfulness, all qualities women find appealing. Got a little extra time? Why not volunteer? A Cornell study found that women who knew a man volunteered found him a better candidate for dating and a long-term relationship, due to the fact that he was more selfless and compassionate. If you really want to get a woman to fall for you, make her laugh. A University of New Mexico study found that those guys who could make a sharp witted quip and make a woman laugh were more likely to have short-term, uncommitted sex than their straight-laced counterparts. These quick bursts reveal creativity and intellect, two qualities women greatly desire.

Lastly, if you want to get more hits on your dating profile, include the words “creative,” “ambitious,” and “laugh.” Dating sight Zoosk did a survey and found profiles that had these words got 33% more messages. Include words like “read” or “book” or exercise words like jogging, lifting weights and the like also increased message frequency. Be sure to take it slow. Mention “drinks” or “dinner” too quickly and your response rate will plummet 35%. So this advice improves your hit rate. But what about quality control? Read, How To Get A Date Worth Keeping: Be Dating In Six Months Or Your Money Back by Henry Cloud, and you’ll have that covered too.

Should we be Happy about the High Divorce Rate?

FUNNY-DIVORCE

Should we be Happy about the High Divorce Rate?

According to the U.S. Census Bureau data, our sour mood on marriage has been sustained for three consecutive years in a row, 2009-2012 with signs that it hasn’t abated. We’ll see what the newest numbers bring. The number of divorces in 2012 reached a record-high of 2.4 million. Not only are we ending more marriages but fewer are being created according to the National Center for Family and Marriage Research. Their findings show the marriage rate is down a whopping 60%.

If you are a believer in marriage, even hoping it’s coming for you, these stats can put you down in the dumps. But just like with every thunderhead the clearest sunny day follows. According to the U.S. Census Bureau, all this divorcing is good for the economy. Two separated people have to get two separate houses, or at least two distinct places to live. That means new leases or mortgages and more money flowing into the economy. That’s good for everyone else. The bad news? There isn’t much benefit to the individual.

Single women are the biggest growing demographic in the economy. They are also buying houses in droves according to the U.S. Association of Realtors. Richard R. Peterso, author of the book Women, Work, and Divorce recently said that, “Divorced and never-married women are more likely to work and to work more hours per year, and are less likely to withdraw from the labor force, than married women.” According to investment website LearnVest.com those who are single shell out more for the privilege of living alone, $67,000 more over six decades.

A recent story in The Atlantic stated that women can expect to make one million dollars more if you take taxes, healthcare and other things such as this into consideration. Though a bad economy usually increases divorce rates, due to the strain it puts on couples, some experts believe lots of people are staying separated, cohabitating instead of getting married and altogether avoiding divorce. Only with time will we see what actually happened to marriage due to the Great Recession.

Divorce to Protect your Kids from Domestic Violence

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Kids who witness domestic violence suffer from anxiety and fear, and it has a negative impact on their psychological well-being one study found. The study was published recently in the journal Psychology of Violence. 517 children took part in this study. A shocking 75% of participants had witnessed domestic violence themselves. On top of that 3% had seen injuries and 21% had heard the incident as it occurred. Psychology research professor at Sewanee, The University of the South, and lead researcher on this study Sherry Hamby wrote in a press release, “Parents are such big figures in a child’s life. If a parent is endangered, that can threaten a child’s well-being. They get worried that if their parent is in danger, then who is going to protect them?” Out of the 75 incidents that did occur, one child was injured. But many more of the participating children suffered from anxiety and fear. 50% worried about the victim or their abuser being seriously injured. 20% said it was the scariest thing they’d ever seen. All socio-economic levels experienced domestic violence. Where the annual income was $20,000 or lower the domestic violence rate was 28%. For those households making between $20,000 and $50,000 the rate was 30%. From $50,000 to $75,000 the domestic violence rate was 18%, and for those making over $75,000 per year the domestic violence rate was 24%.

In terms of demographics, domestic violence occurred among Caucasians 50% of the time, among African-Americans 20% of the time, among Hispanics 16% and 11% for all other racial groups. 75% of the abusers were men according to the study. According to Hamby, “One of the most shocking findings is that less than 2 percent of the cases resulted in jail time for the perpetrator.” Children who come from a home where domestic violence occurs have a higher risk of depression, nightmares, anxiety, trouble at school and even violence when dating as a teen. The trauma that the children experience is equal to they themselves being abused according to Hamby. We as a society need to stand up against domestic violence. More resources should be made available for the victims and their children. No one deserves to be abused and more outreach and advertising needs to be put into place to help educate the victims about the resources available to them, how they should plan to leave, support with the divorce process, and why it is what’s best for them. Certainly it isn’t easy to leave and legislation may be needed to perhaps help protect victims when they are divorcing an abusive spouse. Let’s also not forget the 25% of abusers who are women and make sure that there is no shame attached to men who want to divorce an abusive wife. No one should put up with abuse and not just for their own sake if they have children. To learn more on the phenomenon of domestic violence, read The Domestic Violence Sourcebook by Dawn Berry.

Marriage Contributes to Income Inequality

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Though Cinderella stories do exist, most people marry someone within the same race, religion, social-class, who have similar values, mores and outlooks. In fact, recent data out of the National Bureau of Economic Research shows that between 1960 and 2005 there was an increase in marriages between people of the same education level, which also indicates that these were most probably marriages of people within the same socio-economic level. In 1960 and before, it wouldn’t matter very much if the two had the same level of education, particularly since men were the breadwinners generally and the women stayed home to keep house and raise the children. With the influx of women into the workforce, this data tells us that people marrying within the same class keeps that amount of wealth locked up in that class. Whereas those who married up were more likely to move up socially as well. Before 1960, men married whoever they wished. A woman’s education level didn’t have much bearing. But today, since the couple is more equal and is expected to understand each other on every level, education level is considered important.

The New York Times when evaluating this report said it this way, “Not only are people more apt to marry someone similar to themselves today, but their choices also matter more to society.” Though most people marry within their same class, it’s important to note that someone is not their education level. Nor are they their social class. The high divorce rate, particularly in the U.S. where we have the highest in the world, may pay testament to this fact. Of course, no one is suggesting that one should marry someone simply to raise them out of a certain class, nor should you marry someone for money or their education level. What is important is to try and date many different kinds of people and see who you truly are compatible with. Don’t evaluate someone simply on the basis of their education level. Nor should you rule them out for not reaching the same income level as yourself. Oftentimes, possible mates are thought to be not datable because they haven’t earned a college degree, or a higher degree. Blue collar work can still be challenging, fulfilling, you can make a nice living, and those who work different kinds of jobs can still share the same values, mores, senses of humor and plans for the future. To learn more about the issue of income inequality in the U.S., read the insight of Nobel Prize-winning economist Joseph E. Stiglitz in his New York Times bestseller, The Price Of Inequality: How Today’s Divided Society Endangers Our Future.

Why we don’t often see Black Women with White Men

Couple hugging in urban area

Interracial relationships have lost the stigma they once had, and in fact we are seeing interracial and interethnic dating and marriage in America now more than ever. Also, it is more acceptable to see an interracial couple than ever before. All kinds of people are getting together to explore differences, seek commonalities, and experience love. We even see black men with white women, a paradigm that is still taboo in some parts of the country, the last vestiges of a racially divided society. But one trend seems to be lagging. Why is it we don’t often see black women with white men? Black women aren’t opposed to dating white men per se. And surveys have shown that white people are generally the most open in dating outside their own race. So what gives? Mostly black women believe that white men won’t find them attractive. In the African American community, a curvier body is considered more attractive. Thicker legs, hips, and a round, protruding posterior are what is considered attractive. However, in the white community being thin is considered attractive when it comes to women. Since both of these models of beauty have been ingrained in the minds of each community, it’s difficult for black women to see themselves as being attractive to white men. If you are a black woman interested in attracting a white man, Author Lisa Marble offers some helpful advice in her book, How to be Irresistible to White Men: Interracial Dating Secrets of Asian Women Black Women Who Swirl Should Know.

Another problem is hair. Black women have a difficult time deciding what to do with it. A weave is looked down upon, natural hair is considered “nappy”, and a perm makes people think a black woman wants to look more like a white person. Black men, being part of the community, understand more. However, white men may be clueless when it comes to a black woman’s hair. This may make her feel uncomfortable, so she’ll avoid dating white man so as to avoid the conversation. White men usually date someone in the same socio-economic status. However, due to the many advantages they have in society, and the many disadvantages historically to the African American community, many white men don’t consider black women when out on the dating scene. In our society, though things have changed dramatically, the man still usually makes the first move. Black women aren’t often approached by white men. This statistic may be changing. Generally speaking, white men usually date Hispanic, Asian, or Pacific Islander women when they do date outside their race. Lastly, some black women just aren’t into white guys. A black man’s style is generally different, and they are used to that.