Cheesy pickup lines don’t cut it anymore, if they ever did. People read dating profiles and meet people so fast nowadays it’s hard to stick out. Sure, it can be cute if someone cuts right to the chase with you. But more often than not you have to dazzle them. And in this millisecond attention span world, if you want to get with the best in the dating pool, you’d better wow them. Here are some icebreakers for those at the advanced level. Use these wisely. First, really observe them. Whether you’ve seen this person from afar and have been plotting, or they just caught your eye, see what it is you can connect with. Is there something in their outfit, a hat, shoelaces or anything in-between you can identify with or start a conversation about? Even if you tell them that you bought the same scarf for your grandfather, it’s funny and you’re starting a conversation. Just make sure you follow up with something a bit complimentary or you might be insulting them. Next up, don’t play too cool for school. If you aren’t engaged you aren’t connecting with the person. Be fun, personable, and let your personality shine. You want to be friendly and approachable or else you’ll be turning folks away before you even know that you have.
Ask them questions about themselves. One topic everyone is knowledgeable about and can talk about for hours is him or herself. It’s a subject no one ever tires over. Tell them they remind you of a celebrity. Then ask what celebrity they’d want to be and why. A little while on tell them you think their fascinating and ask them about their dreams. You’ll have their phone number before you know it. Why not accidentally eavesdrop on the object of your affection, sidle in and say something witty, or insightful. Follow up with them in a later conversation. They’ll be warming up to you before you know it. Remember to be interested in the person genuinely. If you objectify them you are also disrespecting them. Your intentions will be known and you’ll be shot down. But if you show genuine interest in the person, that will be recognized and get you through. If you can’t think of anything clever and your mind draws a blank, perhaps comment on your surroundings. How beautiful or dreadfully ugly the décor is for instance is a good one. Then introduce yourself. You’ve had a moment and now you’re talking. But always find some common ground, and listen intently. Too many people aren’t listened to in this world. You’ll be surprised how far it will get you. For more on this topic, read Dating Icebreakers: 700 Relationship Questions by Kerri Wood Thomson.