Are you a powerful man or woman? Are you afraid this makes you unapproachable and perhaps also makes it hard for you to date? Look to see if you fit many or all of the following statements to tell if you are unapproachable. Do you look approachable? Or do you have the “Don’t mess with me” attitude? Are people scared of you or intimidated by your status, position, or occupation? If your friends often say they didn’t like you at first but then warmed to you, this is a good sign that you may appear unapproachable. What about your demeanor? Is it aggressive? Do you do anything it takes to make the right outcome or have your plans come through? This strength and courage can also make you intimidating. What about in terms of communication? Do people often misunderstand you? But you don’t care what they think anyway, right? You may seem a tad unapproachable. Sometimes unapproachable people can attract others with their power, poise, and position. But it can be hard to attract the person you are looking for if you are looking for a long term relationship.
So what can you do to make yourself more approachable? Ask about other people and show an interest in them. Tell jokes in your own style. Wear something ridiculous to the office holiday party. Make a little fun at yourself. Open up just a little and let them know about you. Remember little things about people and follow up with them, such as if their son wasn’t well, ask how he is doing, or if they had a problem, if it got fixed. You can be strong but also be approachable. If you warm up to people and show them another side of yourself, you may even be seen as more attractive and desirable. Also, if you are just strong and powerful, you become a symbol, not a real person. Don’t you want the person you are dating to know the real you? A relationship should be a sanctuary where both parties can go to let their hair down, and shield one another from the cold blasts of the world outside. But how can you attract someone if you don’t give them at least a hint of the warm, gentle, friendly, caring, and considerate person underneath that tough façade? Of course, don’t overdo it. It’s okay to adjust your approach to people. But find ways to do it that match who you are, your own personality, and think about their reaction, how it will be perceived. Opening up just a little might seem scary at first, but you stand to reap tremendous benefits in the long run.