Many articles have been written about the health benefits of being married. People’s emotional, financial, and physical health are generally much better when married as opposed to when single. But this assumes that these are healthy relationships. Half of all marriages today end in divorce. It’s hard to find love that lasts. With that being said, is there something you can do to find a relationship that is wholesome, loving, and long term? There are many things you can do. First, evaluate the relationships you’ve had in the past. Have you had long term relationships? If so, why did they come apart and what were the issues? Many people don’t want to face up to the baggage they themselves bring to a relationship. But it is important to deal with your own problems as well as those the other person carries. Next, are you picking the right type of person for you? Perhaps you like someone opposite from you, the whole opposites attract scenario. But if you don’t have enough in common, there isn’t anything except chemistry, and that will wear thin after the honeymoon phase subsides.
Some people have self-esteem issues, which makes them pick the wrong type of person for them. Instead, work on yourself before you seek another relationship. Why do you harbor these feelings? Did you grow up in a household that lacked a positive role model? (http://www.helpguide.org/mental/how_to_dating_find_love.htm). Perhaps all of the relationships you saw in your childhood were dysfunctional. It may be time to seek counseling. It’s important to evaluate and work on your psychological past. Once you have a better grip on who you are, be open to a relationship but don’t seek one out. The truth is the right person usually comes along when you aren’t looking for them. Love can’t be forced. If you want to meet new people, however, there are lots of ways to go about it. Take up a hobby. A spin class, photography, martial arts, a hiking club, or an art appreciation class at an adult school or community college could spice things up in your life, and you could meet someone who has the same interests as you. Don’t be afraid to try online dating either. Once you are in a healthy relationship, let it proceed naturally. Be open and make the other person feel like they can open up, too. Love is out there for you; all you have to do is be ready when it strikes.