Are you dating someone who had a promise to you and let you down, multiple times? It makes you feel completely disrespected. It shows absolutely no regard for you whatsoever. You need to face this person and deal with them. But believe it or not, it’s also just as important to forgive them if not for any other reason than to give you some closure. If you’ve been stood up, or repeatedly had someone you’re dating say they are going to do something but fail to follow through, realize that you don’t have to put up with this behavior. You deserve to be respected, and you deserve to be with someone who follows through when they give their word. Trust is one of the most important things in a relationship. If there isn’t any trust than a healthy relationship cannot occur. You need to let this person go. Consider whether or not they have someone else in their life, too. Are they being so inconsistent due to trying to hide the fact that they have another person in their life? Look into this more closely. They could just be unreliable. Either way, it’s not the type of relationship you or anyone deserves. So seek a real answer, an apology and closure. But do not even consider moving forward in this relationship. Think of it as being already over.
Give the person a chance to explain themselves, but make sure they have evidence to their claims. Do they have a sick relative or child to take care of? Do they have a medical condition they are dealing with themselves? Are there financial or other considerations? Hear them out. But if there were extenuating circumstances, why didn’t they just let you know from the beginning? They could have trusted you and have been honest from the beginning. Instead, they hid it from you. And is that how they will act whenever something uncomfortable comes up in your relationship? Consider this carefully. If they have no excuse but are exceedingly charming, don’t let them butter you up or wear you down. Remember how it made you feel when they stood you up. Who do they think they are? You aren’t some plaything. You are a human being who deserves respect. Before you confront them, visualize how you expect the situation to go down. What do you picture them saying? Is it true? What evidence do you have that undermines their position? Confront them for real. Don’t let them worm their way out of it. If they refuse to apologize, take that as closure enough and move on. For more guidance on how to move on and forgive a promise breaker, read the advice of Eric Watterson in his book, I Forgive You: Why You Should Always Forgive.