Dealing with After Breakup Jealousy

after breakup

Even if it seemed inevitable, you don’t stop caring for someone just because you’ve broken up. Lots of people think about their ex after a split. They wonder what they are doing, who they are with, if they miss you, and if they have someone new in their life. If they are dating someone new, feelings of jealousy, anger, resentment and frustration can surface. Of course these feelings are normal and natural. You need to grieve and when grieving is over, move on with your life and find someone new. It’s important to learn how to deal with jealousy after a breakup, especially if there is a chance of you running into your ex. First, understand your feelings. They are only natural. But they’re inside of you. Nothing is really going to hurt you. You are just in a transition period. Once you heal, these negative feelings will subside. It’s okay to grieve when the wounds are fresh, but don’t wallow. Why not try to counteract negative feelings with positive ones? Realize that you once had a relationship, it didn’t work out, but you are a unique, beautiful, and special individual. That person wasn’t right for you, and now you are free to find the person who is. Find a friend, family member, mentor, or someone you trust to talk with and vent your emotions. Then treat yourself. Get a new haircut, a new outfit, do something you love to do either by yourself or with friends. It’s all part of the healing process.

If you are still angry and jealous, search these feelings. Why do you feel this way? Is it something about how they treated you or is it an issue you are having? If it’s about how they treated you, then let those feelings go. You’re not with them anymore. And they frankly aren’t worth all of the effort. Instead, focus on yourself. What issues are these feelings stemming from? Do you feel inadequate, insecure, or is there something else? A breakup is a great time to observe yourself and your behavior and try to work on yourself, and make yourself better. Sometimes it’s when we are at our lowest point that we are most open to change and renewal. This may be the impetus to make yourself the best you that you can be. Take a look at your life. Notice not these negative things, but the good things in your life like your friends, family, hobbies, and accomplishments. You can find all kinds of great things that you’ve been taking for granted. Reconnect with them. Focus on yourself. Is there something you’ve always wanted to do or try? Learn to dance, play and instrument, or a foreign language. Take a road trip or go somewhere you’ve always wanted to go. And when you are ready, get out there and find someone new.

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  1. Pingback: How to Battle Envy | Positive Productive

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