Can a Separation Help a Marriage?

Separation Help Marriage Divorce

Most couples think that the idea of a separation is the beginning of the end, but this isn’t necessarily so. Marriages have ups and downs. After the honeymoon phase it takes a lot of work to keep it together. Sometimes two people who love each other and are committed hit a roadblock.  A separation can be a sign of divorce (http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/contemplating-divorce/201004/can-marital-separation-make-your-marriage-better). It could also mean that one or both partners want a little distance to get some perspective on the marriage. But the last type of separation is one used to enrich the marriage.  A married couple can renew and fortify their marriage with a separation that is done correctly. It may seem like an odd thing, but in fact, more and more couples are trying it.

When experiencing issues in the marriage, getting a neutral party to help mediate between spouses can have excellent results. A therapist or a religious leader can be that mediator. Decide together what the expectations and goals of the separation are. Is it to gain perspective, find yourself (which has been lost in the mix of children and marriage), or something else? Set some ground rules. Will you communicate every day? How? Work out the logistics together. Make sure your goal is the same.  Is this the step before divorce or just a time out? Be honest with one another as to why you are taking part in a separation. Don’t use separation with the idea of reuniting as a step out the door. You will hurt your spouse far worse when the expectation is getting back together. If you are having doubts over whether or not you want the marriage to continue, explain that to your spouse. An enhanced separation usually lasts about six months. If one or more members have strayed, or if trust issues or insecurity is something to be worried about, a separation may not be the best, as these issues may increase significantly.

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Tips of Divorce articles are written by our expert team consisting of a recent divorcee, the creator of the website, a lawyer, a journalist, and content managers who edit and publish the articles. All contributors to this site have been impacted by divorce in their family and/or social lives. Our writers come from a wide array of backgrounds to give insights not only into life during and after divorce, but also married life, being a child of divorce, handling the legal aspects of divorce, dating and cohabitating, and more! Divorce has become so commonplace that it's difficult to find anyone who hasn't been affected by it in some way. In fact, recent studies show that many young people avoid marriage out of fear of getting divorced down the line. Divorce truly has an impact on society as a whole, not only the individuals who are directly experiencing it. This is why we encourage our followers to contribute personal insights, stories, and thoughts regarding divorce so that we can gather knowledge and wisdom from various perspectives to be used for future tips to help others.

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  1. Pingback: Should you Date during a Separation? - Tips of Divorce

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